I’m sitting here at the computer taking a breather in the literal sense. I slept last night and it makes me feel better and each day after chemo..the LAST CHEMO…EVER! I RANG THE BELL REMEMBER UNIVERSE, I RANG THE DAMN BELL! I have so much catching up to do on my life which has been put of virtual hold for months now and I just over did it a bit. My energy is not back full force as much as I push for it, I have to realize what I have just been through, how soon we forget, …….NOT!!!!! I have not forgotten anything except how energetic I use to be and I try to do everything I use to do. This has been a hard last chemo with my nails in bad shape, some are white, some are black and brown and I wish they would fall off so they could start to grow again, comeon….and the nurophy in my fingertips and toes is in my opinion pretty horrible, the swelling in my left arm with the lymphodema is bad right now because I’ve been lifting, sweeping and trying to get stuff done at home. Feeling pretty much like the Mack truck has been back hitting me again the past two weeks, I was house bound for almost a week after the chemo unless someone came and took me out and I couldn’t stay upright very long…but I plan on with a little help from some friends be at the First Saturday Art Market tomorrow….selling my wares…working on new pieces of jewelry, has many bouncing around in my head, just need to get in there and make them for you.
I’ve learned a lot about disease, people, cancer, human nature, anger, just how short life really is, and all I want to do is dance….I can’t wait till I can dance again. Yeah, I talk about it all the time and I may not be all that good but moving my feet to a beat is what I feel like I do best, it makes me feel alive and happy….I have a NEW LEVEL of ALIVE AND HAPPY NOW…try going through chemo for 6 months and some go much longer than me, and hospitalized twice because the chemo was too strong for my body and my potassium dropped to dangerous lows…this has been a ride I would wish on none. Almost a year or more before my cancer diagnosis, I thought about writing a blog and this title came to me…that is how most things do come in my noggin…they just appear quickly and if I don’t write them down and keep them, they flee…. life is short, dance fast…little did I know at the time that I would really get to know exactly what that line meant, especially to me…and how! Kinda like one of my chapters about Take Time To Smell the Roses….we don’t often get second chances. And I didn’t know I was this wise till I started to write. I’ve always felt like I had a book in me somewhere, I’ve had a very colorful life in these many 62 years I’ve been on this planet. And maybe that will be my next blog…
April 12, I will be in surgery for a mastomecty of my left breast, then radiation, then reconstruction in 6 months…this is the last news I heard from my physicians and all that can change next week after latest MRI discovery. I hope it changes in my favor…not to excited to lose my breast and have it replaced but the good new will be, whatever little cancer cells that are left will be cut out and then burned up with radiation. All I want again is my life back, but I get a new one, as a survivor….
I plan on being in the art car parade in Bonnie’s car again as a survivor of breast cancer with several other women…I told you I would be in the parade, it is kinda where I got started last year. I knew I was sick, I just didn’t know how badly all during the Art Car Festivites talk about denial!!! I was the Queen of Denial!!…but I kept it to myself. You that know me, know I don’t keep good news to myself, but this was my life and it is still ongoing….
I will post again after my physician visits next week…..
I am selling at the First Saturday Art Market April 2 and Pretty Little Things, vintage clothing sale on April 9…please come out and support me and all the other vendors and artist…we work hard for our money first for the passion and second, to EAT…lololol…bringing and making beautiful art and beautiful vintage clothing….Thanks everyone for sticking with me, supporting me and praying most of all. I wish I could hug everyone and say thank you personally. HAng on, It Ain’t over yet….