Day after my first chemo: Woke up pretty shaky and a little nauseated. I can definitely feel the chemicals sitting in my body. I am drinking lots of green tea, water and eating cookies for the nausea…nice…cookies..cookie monster is what I’m going to be for a few days till this passes. Medicinal cookies makes the nausea go away. The alternative makes you no go poopie….but you don’t throw up either and those combination, I rather not have…lololol…sorry, yall know I’m graphic and I cleaned this one up. I have been told your energy level drops on the third day when your white blood cells decline. So, friends, if you have the sneezes or tummy contagious things, please don’t come around me, I can’t get sick my immune system is compromised…OR let me know and we both can wear masks…if for our own peace of mind, I don’t get sick and it won’t make you feel bad that I caught something from you. Not being bitchy here, just being real…cause y’all know I hate not hanging with my peeps. I love so many of you out there it is unbelievable to me that I have so many friends and supporters. I am one blessed woman.
Now, here is something that came in my mailbox this morning…
“There are only miracles, Sam, and to one degree or another they all soothe, pamper, and enrich. However, to avoid blowing too many minds at once, some are disguised as unpleasant surprises, botched circumstances, and twisted acquaintances that can rarely be seen for who or what they truly are until the pendulum has fully swung. Yes, don’t I think of everything?The Universe (this is directed to me today for sure)”
Really knocked my socks off when I read that…think that is going to be my mantra for this whole crappy thing I’m going to be journeying in the next year…till I get to the other side and find out my prize. Cause I deserve a tiara after this one Babies…and any other woman that has gone through this disease. There are so many survivors and that is a comforting thought to me TODAY! The unfortunate thing is that I have meet a lot of survivors and that makes me sad. So many women are coming down with this. I met three at our little market over the weekend who were either had been sick or relative/sister came down diagnosed with this damn cancer, breast cancer. And I have faith that this is a little another bump in the road for me and I too will be a survivor. I have actually had someone say to me, at least you only have breast cancer! This made me feel mad, glad and sad, Breast can has high rate of survival but sometimes not, sometimes it is the pre cursor for more…so thanks?for?the?backhanded?wish?complement? You know who you are!
Yesterday with completed with a little help from my friends….I could not been as comfortable or safe without these two ladies holding my hand.
It only hurt yesterday when the first put the IV in my arm…and boy did it hurt, in my forearm inside about an inch….damn…buddy, it was a bitch and a half….Don’t move Ms. VanBibber…and I screamed….I don’t do well with needles-and each time a new surge of chemicals went inside of me it hurt a lot. Other than feeling exhausted from no sleep the night before, chemicals surging through my body killing nasty cancer cells, eating bad hospital food…they called it food! And just scared out of my ass….I did fine. Lace and I got a little closer and that was a very good thing. Basically, the Universe email I got this morning states my condition exactly. Kinda screwed but will have a good ending. I will ruminate later to you. Need to lay down.